Marina is over me too!

“Marina is over me too!”

This sentence was copied from a Myspace comment that a friend(?) of mine sent to a friend of hers. I’ll call them friend1 and friend2, respectively.
The ironic part is that she, friend1, is the one that announced to me with an email that I was paranoid and therefore [I’m assuming] not worth the time to talk about whatever caused the alleged “paranoia”. Where I come from, that means she is over me. Yet she then proceeded to send a message to friend2 stating just the sentence in the title. Dramatic, uh? Enough to provoke this “fun” response from friend2:

“well i am glad to be bak first page, and surprise not o see our italian cheerleader….I WONDER WHY??? we are estremist…endure until u cut, Ii realize that friendship is like a marriage or better and or worse, but after u give chanches after chanches, it is over mistake are ok… double standard and arrongance of been always right when actually u so wrong is a narrow mind…..I have all kind relantion ship…but they have one thing in common..what people see of me is who i am, that is why the stick with me forever……your list is incomplete….I wonder why I was ask first to be married…..mistey of life…2 week u r strong girl ( unless u heat little stinky)love u from Sardinia Italy”

yeah, don’t worry, the computer is not scrambling, this is how she actually writes [it’s not a criticism, just a fact].

Again, there is irony in the second message too. See, friend2’s first husband left her for another woman years ago, yet, one day, when we were friends(?) [yep, that’s why the title include the word “too”] she asked me to accompany her somewhere in the middle of the night; I don’t want to go deep into details: the bottom line is that it wasn’t an emergency [I have been there for those when she needed me], so I refused to go. This caused an avalanche of emails telling me how bad I was, and arrogant, and know it all. On top of that, she added that if my man cheated on me, “that tell me something wrong with you” [<— her words]. Like I said before, her husband left her, but, of course, there's nothing wrong with her…. Doesn't all this sound like something happening in junior high school? That's why I have decided to vent it all here and then let it go. 'Cause this is sooo stupid. Besides, this is another milepebble in my life, so it belongs here. Of course if they ever read this, it would strengthen their idea of me being arrogant or whatever they think I am, but, truly, it shouldn't be so damn dramatic to have friendships. And, like Rhett Butler says at the end of Gone With The Wind : "Frankly, Scarlet, I don’t give a damn“.
At the base of both cases is non communication from both friend1 and friend2, and self-centrism from friend2. See, when friend2 writes “friendship is like marriage or better or worse”, [I know, it’s: for better or for worse] why these things she preaches are not followed by her? is she exempt? Why am I the only one who should follow that “rule”? Why couldn’t she understand that I did not feel like going out in the middle of the night? friendship should be a two way street: she had a need to go out that night, I had a need to stay home.

I resigned to the idea that self centered people only see/understand what they want to see/understand. It’s too hard for them to accept when things don’t go their way, and they often blame others of the same things they are guilty of. They only blame it on themselves when they are full of pills, but then, again, they are blaming the pills….

I was cheated, lied and verbally abused by a husband, talked down and slandered by friend2, and accused of untruthful things by friend1. Does anybody blame me for being paranoid or not wanting to get too close to anybody anymore?

You be the judge.

4 thoughts on “Marina is over me too!

  1. Your Friends, I will call them thing one and thing two for the purpose of this writing) Sound absolutely nuts. Run away, run away!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. The two people you describe don’t sound like good friends to me. They seem so snarky and mean. Your friend who got mad at you because you wouldn’t leave with her to go out in the middle of the night sounds incredibly unreasonable. A real friend wouldn’t ask for something like that (demand something like that) unless it was truly a very serious situation….and even then I think the person would be very humble about asking for help. At least that’s the way I would be.I agree with the other comment….run the other way. Being so mean and sending such negative messages back and forth isn’t what adult friendship is about.I really hope you feel better. Try not to let these negative people get to you. Life is way too short !!

  3. What a good friend Valery is ,she did a good job by commenting and follow up, treasure her at least she is real not virtual friends that hide in a monitor

  4. Rosella, the first comment was mine. I am in Northern Va. taking care of my Mother who has breast cancer. It reminds me every day to treasure friendships and the people who love you. Valerie

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