“Why resolutions don’t work.
The reason most resolutions don’t work is that they address only one level of your life. The DO level. It’s the DO-HAVE-BE model. “I will DO this thing.” (i.e., Lose weight) “So I can HAVE this other thing” (Self-Esteem) and I can BE this thing. (Confident.)
The average New Year’s Resolution doesn’t address the core of the issue – the “BE” level.
The best order for creating positive changes in your life is the BE-DO-HAVE model. This means you start from the BE level. When you begin changing on the BE level of your life, then the DO level and the HAVE level follow more easily.
When you start only on the DO level, then all the blocks on the BE level will often become the obstacles you can’t overcome.
A better new year’s ritual
Several years ago, my friend Kathy and I decided that, instead of making resolutions, we would pick a word that would guide us throughout the year. It would be our touchstone. It would remind us of living our lives at the BE level.
This didn’t mean that we didn’t take action. It meant that our actions were inspired from the BE level. In fact, I took more action than ever with this new approach!
(..) Just one word. That’s all.
I felt really inspired by this concept. The idea to have a word to guide me all year long in relation to many aspects of my life is very appealing to me.
I always hated the new years resolutions, and never set any goals in January just because it’s the first month of the year.
I chose the word HARMONY. I want to be able to balance, harmonize my actions with my values. That way I’ll KNOW I’m doing what is best for me.
Today I am grateful for learning new things.